QotD 10/20/11

Dan is talking about his daughters job at a drug rehab center.
Eulalia: Is it a private facility?
Dan: No, you can go there.

QotD 8/20/11

At a Red Bull away game in New England.
All chanting: We want Rooney, we want Rooney. Then: We want Hertzog, we want Hertzog. Running though a few more players.
Finally, guy in back of me: *sob* We want anyone. Please make a sub!!

QotD 3/17/11

We're discussing painting the kitchen and Uncle Ron motions to the ceiling fan.
Uncle Ron: 3 cups of paint on that blade and 3 on that one. Turn it on and run like hell.
Melissa: Why don't you use a paintball gun?
Uncle Ron (shocked): Noooo, that makes a mess!

QotD 11/25/10

Monika: Joey and Steven were legit trying to kill me! One was jumping on my head and the other was trying to set me on fire!

QotD 9/22/10

Mom: Where'd you put my phone?
Melissa: It's in the snack bag, in the granola bar box.
Mom: umm.
Melissa: Why, where do you normally keep it?

QotD 06/12/10

Chiefs says he doesn't want to hear about health food.
Mat: Tofu!
Chiefs: I like tofu.
Me: Soy!
Chiefs: I like Soy del Metro.

QotD 5/24/10

Jenn, answering the phone: Hello?... I'm in the middle of writing you a nasty email, can you hold on a minute?