QotD 1/29/10

2 today

Koreen: I need to sit with you.
Ray: Monday.
Koreen: No, now!
Ray: Monday.
Koreen: I'm only here in the morning on Monday.
Ray: Until what time?
Koreen: When does the morning end?!
Ray: Noon.
Koreen: There you go.

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{this is all one sentence, no pause, and I have no idea what he was talking about}
Harry (on the phone): I thought you'd be dead you're so stupid.

QotD 1/1/10

Talking about getting bisons to kill and make bison burgers.
Chiefs: We'll get two, one in the pool and one on the lawn.
Me: Does the pool have water in it?
Chiefs: Yes.
Me: You can't put it in the pool! It'll drown!
Chiefs: No, we're going to get a water buffalo.